The Females We Can’t Stand At the Bar

The Crabby One

The Plus Side? – She is usually hot.

What is this chicks deal? We are at a pub where you head to drink away all the bitchy people you deal with during the week. If I wanted to be wined to, I’d get back with my crazy ex-girlfriend. I question her, “How is your night going?” Her answer is, “I can’t stand all of these little people, they are disgusting.”  I wish these girls would just sit there and not say a word.  You just want to take her back to my place ang give her the shocker.

The Fat Flirt

The Plus Side? - Overweight Girls Are Great For Practice & They Are Very Giving

They always seem to travel in groups!  Making us all feel awkward by swaying around the pub hitting on at every guy within a chunky arms reach. Stop your touchy feely waysand go practice them on a male stripper. Humpback sistas, please don’t bother me when enjoying my Amberbock and don’t for one second use that pickup “I laugh at the funny tee shirts that you wear

The Wild Chick

The Advantages? – She’s a Freak in the Sheets! You’ll Enjoy Things You’ve Only Read About

She is very often “The Drunk Chick” but that black pleather skull and bones trenchcoat along with neck tattoos is just not hot.  And those are just the tatts that I can see.  If I were to get you buck naked, I might just feel bad for Rocky, because written in a fresh tattoo right above your ass crack, your Rocky’s girl. But if you’re not affraid of the results of taking Herpes Meds three to six times a day and hangin with a broad sporting a “I’ll Snap Your D*ck Off” T-Shirt and other offensive t-shirts, then this nutty hag is your broad.

The Responsible One

What is the advantage? -  There aren’t any. But if the responsible one has a dimepeice friend… you can only pray she doesn’t cock block you.

And I held this one for last! You know when you meet someone and you think that guy/girl will never, ever find a wife/husband, let alone have sexual intercourse with someone other than a flesh light or Glass Vibrator. Well combine this with a “Debbie Downer” attitude and you have “The Responsible Girl.”  Very often the girl is is mildly to extremely hideous with a little personality that she adapted to while watching Golden Girls

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